With over 7 years clean and continuing our Recovery Lifestyle, we're in a very different place then we were back then.
In our early 20's you can bet we spent more on Black Friday... and we didn't make the best financial decisions.
Fast forward to 2023?
I bought a budget book for cash stuffing since Jak let me know he feels he is better with money when it's physical ($8) and Jak bought a shelving unit for the basement to organize his stuff ($66).
That was it. We spent a whopping $74 this year for Black Friday Sales.
There were a lot of Black Friday Sales that did catch my eye - some business related sales and some personal related sales - and I took the entire week to evaluate the sales....
I know, this year I made sure that if I was going to spend money - that I didn't budget for - it was going to be something within reach (aka money in the bank not on a card) and it was going to be something that was truly needed and/or valuable on the ROI.
For Jak and I a budget book was worth it to help Jak get better with finances and the shelving unit was long over due and I know we will both have peace of mind and less anxiety after Jak organizes his car tools and tires in the basement with the new shelf.
However, yesterday I read a CNBC article on how Black Friday Sales this year were up, with the sales coming in at 9.8 Billion - up 7.5% from last year!
What shocked me more was, as quoted in the article linked above, "$79 million of the sales came from consumers who opted for the ‘Buy Now, Pay Later’ flexible payment method to stretch their wallets, up 47% from last year."
Now, I've been known to say that if recovery is out of financial reach then you have the power to find a way - whether it's selling things, getting a 0% APR credit card, or cutting out frivolous spending (i.e. coffee runs, take out, clothes you don't need, etc.) to find the money to prioritize recovery.
I still stand by that.
There are ways to get creative to show yourself what you prioritize.
Some of the best clients I've had put in the effort to make their budget prioritize their recovery.
Now, this re-arranging of the budget, cutting frivolous spending, and selling things isn't something you do long-term (unless that's a goal of yours), it's more of a seasonal change to fit what you need right now in life.
7+ years ago, Jak and I did not have decent incomes.
We were not even scraping by in a 600-700 SQFT 1 bedroom apartment- seriously, we needed money from family to help us cover rent at the time.
Things were really hard.
We had every reason to throw in the towel, break up (we were only dating when I discovered his addiction), and not do the recovery work.
But we made a different choice.
We knew that if we wanted our relationship to not only survive, but make it to marriage and a healthy one at that, we needed to invest in ourselves.
We did get one of those 0% APR credit cards (I think it was between 18 -24 months at the time) and we put all recovery expenses on that card for the first year and eventually paid the card off.
Now, I'm not saying you have to go into debt to get into recovery. We honestly didn't have much to our name so selling things wouldn't really cut it for us and cutting coffee runs didn't meet the goal either.
So we made a choice - the best one we had at the time - to prioritize our individual and relational recovery.
Now, if you missed out on the email I sent earlier this week, I'm copying and pasting the text from it below as the offer ends at midnight tonight.
If you're in a solid maintenance stage of recovery, you might honestly not need any of this.
But if you're in the early stages, I would really take the time to review it, and ask me questions if you have any about working together (remember, you want to vet anyone you're hiring on your recovery team!).
I've mentioned a paid newsletter that I've been working on. After getting feedback, I've decided to offer 2 tiers of the newsletter to accommodate various requests and budgets.
I'm launching Savvy Answers in a paid format for this Black Friday for anyone who truly wants support in their recovery but is not ready to truly invest in 1:1 coaching or 1:1 is outside of their monthly budget.
Each week you can expect at least 1 Recovery/Relationship Lesson, 1 Recovery/Relationship Opportunity, and answers to the questions you’ve submitted (up to 8 Q’s/month) so that you can begin to see forward momentum in your recovery (which can also have more Relationship and Recovery Opportunities!).
Outside of the Weekly Q & A, you can vote on relationship and recovery books for me to read and review!
I’ll also be reviewing technology for the recovery process.
As a Savvy Answers VIP you can expect everything in Savvy Answers….with the following:
You’ll be able to enter into a book giveaway as well as technology giveaways throughout the year! (Plus, I’ll even be offering the exact book I read with my insights as well as a personal hand written letter to you as the winner of the giveaway – I promise I don’t have chicken scratch hand writing!)
You’ll be able to submit unlimited questions each month!
You’ll be able to fill out the intake that I have my private clients fill out so that your answers to your questions are more personalized and effective!
You’ll be, as a VIP, the only ones offered discounts (25% – 50% off) on any other services, programs, or products.
Knights & Warriors is not open at this time as I'm working on building it into an online course.
However, because Knights & Warriors is so valuable, I don't want Knights & Warriors to be inaccessible until I'm done transforming the program into a course format (as I'm not sure when I'll be done).
With that said, if you (and/or your partner) sign up for the Quarterly E-Coaching during this Black Friday Week, I will include Knights & Warriors material that will help support achieve the goals we agree to work on in those 3 months together!
So which offer above may be right for you?
Now with all that said, I hope that you're enjoying your Sunday!
If you have any questions on the above offers, hit reply and I'll be around to talk with you today.
And if there are still sales going on today and tomorrow, remember to evaluate them before spending to make sure you don't have buyers remorse or spent more money than you have.
Your partner in recovery,
Savvy Esposito
P.S. What am I doing daily and weekly to keep building on my recovery lifestyle?
Reading: Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
Listening to: Dear Hollywood by Alyson Stoner
Watching: The Smart Money Happy Hour ($175k/year is poor now? -links to Youtube so check in with accountability partner first if that's a trigger site for you)
Savannah is passionate about helping engaged and married couples struggling with trust, communication, sexual intimacy, intimacy anorexia, sexual addiction, and betrayal trauma achieve the healthy, connected, and loving marriage they’ve always dreamed of.
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